Check this out. Joe Vitale reveals the real reason why he wears beads.

Popularity: 2% [?]

Ignore your audience at your own risk. Nuff said.

Popularity: 2% [?]

When we moved to our new school district I was happy that it’s academics were phenomenal but worried at the same time that homework would take over family life. I had heard horror stories over the past ten years of an avalanche of homework overwhelming both kids and parents.

Thankfully this has not happened to us and Hannah gets time to learn, create and play. Too many parents, pundits and what I like to call academic do nothings, don’t realize how important play is to the development of our kid’s brains.

Thankfully, parents and experts are starting to speak out.

There’s an interesting story across the news wires today about the loss of playtime for America’s children. On the surface this may not seem as important as what’s going on overseas or in Washington, but I think you might want to take a second look here.

Mounting evidence shows that all work and no play makes Jack and Jill not only obese but dull and uninteresting. So says more and more psychologists and other experts. What’s to blame for an epidemic of dullards coming out of American schools? TV? High-fructose corn syrup? The internet?

While these are all bad for you, none apparently are as insidious as homework. That’s right. Too much homework makes Jack a dull boy and Jill uninterested in forming healthy relationships. After a busy day at school, kids come home to do homework and have time for nothing else. Sure they go off to a variety of organized sports, but often never play with the kids next store.

The funny thing is that the same thing is happening to moms and dads. The preponderance of devices that seem to run our lives instead of enhancing them is scary. Blackberries, cell phones and emails are only serving to isolate us all by having us bring our work home.

Men and women already have a hard enough time communicating.  it used to be that dad would get home, ask what’s for dinner and then enjoy dinner with his wife and kids. today things are different. Obviously mom works now thereby changing the household dynamic considerably. Dad for his part gets home then goes into the basement or home office to catch up on emails.

The nation’s 50% divorce rate  illustrates this and will no doubt get higher.  If we train them from birth to have as little human interaction as possible, divorce rates can only get worse.

Popularity: 1% [?]

The New York Times article on the story can be found here.

If Barack Obama can run America without his Blackberry why can’t you run your life without it?

No longer will he be able to get instant updates on what the Chicago White Sox are doing or what his sister is up to in Hawaii. He won’t be able to check in with friends, family or other close confidants. No more Facebook, Yahoo, or Twitter for personal use. Barack Obama has become property of these United States.

I recently bet a family member that he couldn’t go a week without checking his Blackberry. He, like Barack Obama, is a Blackberry addict. My family member truly believes that he can’t do without it. Needless to say he declined my offer.

For a variety of different legal and safety issues, President-elect Obama is about to give up email and his Blackberry. Yes, after a long and storied affair with his Blackberry, Barack Obama will give his Blackberry up upon entering the Oval office.

I think this brings up some interesting questions that you might ask yourself.

Let’s say you negotiating to buy a new home and you’d have to give up email to seal the deal. Would you do it? Could you do it?

If in order to get your dream job, you’d have to give up Facebook, would you do it? Could you give up all email for the job? Could you give up your cell phone?

In the past, I have no doubt derided all these technologies as false prophets of personal connectivity. Remember the information superhighway? Or did you already crash along the way? These devices often serve more as barriers to creativity, our relationships and the personal connections we all crave.

Even worse, technology may have killed the art of conversation. Remember those? Where two people interested in what each other had to say, actually talked to each other in person. If you’re under the age of twenty-five, you probably have no idea what I’m talking about. Just go ask your grandmother what it is and she’ll also regale you with stories of rotary phones and long distance calls

If you’re as concerned as I am with the state of communication in this great world of ours, then I have a quick and easy suggestion for you.

Take the lead of some of America’s leading companies. Companies like U.S. Cellular, Deloitte & Touche and Intel have banned emails from coming in or going out on Fridays and have in turn seen productivity and communication soar.

See their story here: http://online.wsj.com/public/article/SB119205641656255234.html

These companies realized that an avalanche of impersonal communication will never be as productive as a heartfelt conversation in the flesh. So as fast and convenient as texts and emails can be, companies are finding out that they’re far more productive without them. Kind of ironic don’t you think?

Why don’t you take a leaf from their book and do the same?

Popularity: 1% [?]

I Got to see Joe Vitale last night who was featured in The Secret and and has written over 30 books. He was also on Larry King Live!The video above features me preparing to go see him at Barnes & Noble, Naperville.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Conversations matter.

Are you having conversations with the people you care about it? Do you have time to make conversation? When you have a conversation, is it fulfilling? Is the conversation one sided? Do you consider yourself a good listener? Mind you, talking about the weather doesn’t count. Regaling your spouse with tales of work doesn’t count. Complaining doesn’t count. Negativity doesn’t count. I believe small talk is for small people.

So when’s the last time you had a heart to heart conversation where you listen to what your partner has to say?

I think good conversation is more art form than plan but there are ways to encourage it, to foster it and make it as satisfying as possible.

One way my folks did it was by having a regular date night. I remember my mom getting all gussied up for their big night. I also remember the babysitters being pretty boring!

Another way my parents fostered conversation was at the dinner table. Both my mom and dad insisted that our family sit down for dinner every single night. At the dinner table, I remember my parents talking to each other about each other’s day and actually listening to each other.  Yes, actually listening to each other! While they didn’t always like what the other had to say, it was obvious that they respected each other’s opinion. As kids we could pipe in to but we were never to interrupt or say negative things about anything.

Always be prepared to bring something to the table. Joe Kennedy, father of John F. Kennedy always insisted that his kids bring their thinking caps to the table. The Kennedy kids always brought their thoughts on the happenings of the day as it pertained to politics and world affairs. Can you imagine the level of conversation at that table? How do your conversations measure up?

An advanced technique I know of involves you and your significant other picking out a book or article and discussing the book before you go to bed. I know of a couple that does it in the bed! They read excerpts from popular self-help and self-development books to each other in bed. They then have a pleasant conversation about what was just read.

With the benefit of experience and time, I believe that my parents were bonded to each other better than most because they took the time to understand each other better through the art and discipline of conversation. It’s through their lessons and those of others that I to have learned and been bettered through good conversation.

Popularity: 1% [?]

I was going to blog about something else but thought I should write about a link I was able to obtain through special arrangement. The link directly exposes some of the techniques and tactics that pick up artists use to get women to do whatever they want. While I always thought good conversation was key to engaging the opposite sex, pick up artists go about it in a different way.

These so called artists use secret knowledge of the female brain and how her brain works to literally get inside the female brain and almost take it over. Once inside, these men are able to get a significant number of women to do their bidding.

You’ll no doubt be offended by what they have to say as I was. After calming down I suggest you sit back down and take a second look at what they have to say.

I think what you’ll see are men who originally had extreme difficulty talking to women. Their brains were never wired for the meaningful heartfelt conversation that women crave. Many of these pick up artists were originally horrible with women. Once they realized that talking to women was actually fun and rewarding they were transformed into literal Don Juans.

The link is here.

Popularity: 1% [?]

From Oprah to Dr. Phil, from Maury to Montel, from Dr. Laura to Dr. Oz, there is no shortage of credible, professional people trying to help you help your relationship. The trick is to pick the right one – for YOU.

This takes some work; it takes some experimenting. Don’t be afraid to try something new only to throw it out when it doesn’t work. Okay, so the latest hardcover bestseller costs $25 at Target.

Buy it anyway…

If it doesn’t work for you, donate it to a couple who it might work for, a church looking for such books or the lending library at work. If the CD or DVD turns out to be a waste as well, donate that too. This won’t be money wasted; I promise. One breakthrough solution is worth its weight in gold, trust me!

            If money is an issue, go to the library, buy it used off Amazon.com or simply wait until it comes out in paperback or into the Clearance bins at Borders. While you’re waiting, try someone other than the most bestselling, most famous or most handsome expert; my wife and I have discovered many a valuable resource far away from the new releases or bestsellers aisle.

            It’s all in doing the work; you can’t just open the latest, greatest self-help book and expect the words to leap off the page. Yes, it should be written in an entertaining way, but it’s still talking about tough things that need to be done.

            At the end of the day, it’s all about finding the right resource for you.

            But how will you find one if you never start trying?

Popularity: 1% [?]

I really feel like I’m letting the cat out of the bag, like I’m about to reveal too much. Some guys won’t be happy with what I’m about to tell you. In fact, some have already told me so! But I feel that not enough is being said about how guys really think.

The more you know about how your guy thinks and the way his mind wants to communicate with you, the better off you’ll be.

For instance, if a guy’s girlfriend tells him all her problems going on, he immediately seeks to fix them in his mind. If he can’t fix them, he moves onto something that can be fixed all but ignoring her plea for help. Dinner can be fixed, right? Guys can’t fix your boss (without getting sued or jailed), helicopter you over traffic to work, or cut your hair (wash and shampoo extra!).

This all being said, there’s no doubt that guys need to improve their communication, their bond, their connections to their wives and girlfriends. And that’s where all of these self-help tools come in handy. So the question is how can you involve your guy and make him the very best man that he can be? Here are four quick tips that might help:

1. Make it guy friendly: Sometimes, guys need to be played; particularly when you’re introducing self-help into the household. So do your research and find the most knockout, well-written, guy-friendly book on the market and start with that. Don’t go straight to Dr. Laura or Mars vs. Venus or something you’d like; let him get his feet wet with something he’ll like. Believe it or not, there are books that appeal to men in the self-help aisle.

2. Make it interesting: Don’t just hand your guy a self-help book, CD or DVD and expect him to read, listen or watch; he needs your help to help himself! Do it together. Serve his favorite food while you read aloud from the book, light candles and sit on the porch as you listen to the DVD or serve his favorite snacks while you watch the DVD. I know of a couple that read each other to sleep using a variety of self-help books.

3. Make it short: Guys, like kids, don’t have very long attention spans. The quickest way to get a guy hating on self-help is to show him a 400-page book, a 6-CD volume or a double-DVD collector’s series special edition. Even if the book has 400 pages or the set has 6-CDs or DVDs, break it down for him and promise him you won’t cover it all in one night!

4. Make it a package deal: I work with a colleague whose church suggested pre-marriage counseling for the lucky couple. The girl rejoiced; the guy resisted. And resisted, and resisted – until she promised him dinner at his favorite Chinese buffet on the way home after every Wednesday afternoon session. Soon, he couldn’t wait to go to counseling; and not just because of the buffet. They both started looking forward to the day together, the exploration of feelings with a trained counselor during the session and the continued discussion afterward. To this day his eyes light up when he recounts the eight weeks of pre-wedding counseling they had!

Popularity: 1% [?]

There probably hasn’t been a better relationship killing device ever invented than the Blackberry. And now I have a survey to prove it!

The Chicago Tribune had a great article on the subject and Rewind with Anna Davlantes featured an illuminating segment on it so I felt the need to weigh in on it.

If you have not seen what all the hub bub is all about then let me fill you in. Never fail Inc commissioned a survey on Blackberry use among Americans. What they found while not surprising to me is nonetheless scary:

• One out of three would prefer time with their Blackberry than their spouse
• Four out of five have used it while driving and in the bathroom
• 11% have deferred to it while romantically involved with another person
• Almost one out of six have used it at a funeral

If this doesn’t give one pause, I don’t know what will. Does the term Blackberry widow send shudders down your spine? If not, then you ought to stop reading anything I write NOW.

I feel like I’m beating a dead horse, but I see today’s technology as a catch 22. We can’t live with it and we can’t live without it. I guess its just like the early days of the internet: ubiquitous. Yet, no matter how many bars you have, your phone and your computer will only break you and your loved ones apart. I feel like I’m on an island yet the stats continue to back me up.

Popularity: 1% [?]