Last week I took Hannah and Alan to the library to see a puppet show. The library we went to was huge. Its relationship section was equally as huge so I had to check it out. Among the many tomes was Dating, Mating and Manhandling by Lauren Frances, Ph. Double D. The bright color and title made it stand out amongst the rest. Of course, I try never to judge a book by its cover, so I read the introduction and was summarily hooked.

Unlike many books on the subject, Frances’ book is fun and fast on its (bird) feet. For instance on the subject of Peckerheads (jerkoffs) she writes: “These men are like large boys zipped into man suits. The Peckerhead is selfishly self-involved, and under the mistaken impression that women, relationships and the entire world at large are simply there for their pleasure. He will denature a forest preserve and quickly strip-mine your heart”

Frances book goes beyond entertainment by providing scripts for handling those tough conversations you might have with your guy like the “talk” or his permanent dismissal.

I disagree on only some minor points. She points out that that while guys can be very dog like (dirty dogs, lying dogs, etc), they are not loyal like your average poodle is. I suppose I can see the comparison but feel the need to point out that most domesticated dogs are neutered! Frances also quotes Pat Allen as saying that if a guy does not call you, you can wait 8 weeks for him to do so. 8 weeks! If a guy hasn’t called you in 8 weeks then either he has no plans for you as a couple or he can’t cope with you and him as a couple. Either way, dump him.

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